Love me, adore me when you still can :D

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

It is lunch break right now! My team for the day is sweet except for the only irritating ass. He is like deaf? When talk to him about the project, he is like listening to his song and in his world completely ignoring the rest beside him. FREAK ! oh dear, If not for the grade, I will have screwed him up totally (:

Well, haven been blogging lately and I felt damn uneasy when I didnt blog for long? Am I addicted to this? I ain't sure. All I know is that most of the time, I am like surround with all sort of people and most of them are kinda fake? I don't know where I am heading to on this track I am on, wandering aimlessly every mintues and seconds. Hoping that something will strike me and give me some enlightments (:
Have been thinking alots for these days and not been able to get a good sleep so far. Dammit, Hell-NO ! I want to sleep, yet my soul and mind is like stonning all the time. I am tired ):

Yesterday, called Huikee and then out of concidence, Liny called in too. So we conference for like 3 hrs? Amazing man, it had been times since this last happen (:
I am glad that they are there to listen to me whinns whenever I am like stress out and feel helpless. Liny told me not to get to addicted to blogging as it can change one to change in his/her attitude/character. Is there a change in me right now? I don't know. I don't even know what the real me is like already after so much that had happened.
I need a rest. A rest to run away from my troubles and to get away from reality.

For him, like what we discuss it is like the third time i fall back into this track . Why? I really wondered. He doesn't treat me that well. I agreed that Nic is better than him, and I actually do appreciate him for replacing and healing my wounds when i decides to leave Darryl. Yet, since I leaves him already and had dump him that time, why does this feelings don't seems to fades? STUPID ):
Making me seems like a fool can, beating around him and hiding like a kitten in order to protect myself from all the hurt I might bring about. Pucks, all we communicates about now is like just short conversations about our current life? Oh dear, it is like CRAPS ):
I need to get up my own, climb out from this high walls that is blocking me to reach out the outside world. I am simply just holding myself back in the past. Hoping that things have all not happen before which is stupidcity. I need to CHANGE ((:
I MUST CHANGE =)))

my dirty lil secrets___
6/27/2006 11:50:00 AM